At this point in the semester, you’re probably too busy to care about simple things like basic hygiene and cleanliness. Last week, we asked all of you to Snapchat us and showcase just how messy your room has become.
Your submissions were so messy that we don’t even think any of you even understands what it means to be clean anymore. On the bright side, they made us feel slightly better about our own disorganized rooms—and that’s all that truly matters, right?
You clueless ruffians may be wondering, “Why even submit messy rooms?” The answer is simple: We’re giving out free Muji pens for the messiest slumdogs of Barnumbia.
Now let’s find out who won this week’s Muji gift package surprise!Runner-Up #5: Chandana Golla, SEAS ’20
The best part is the little bow you put on top of the garbage heap. I feel like there are secretly more bags and you’re afraid of revealing more crap hidden behind your door. Either way, I hope the garbage chute gets fixed soon.
@changola / via Snapchat Runner-Up #4: Aliya Schneider, BC ’20
I really burst out laughing at this, Aliya. It’s okay though. I actually haven’t showered in the past two days (don’t tell anyone), so you’re not the only person whose hygiene is going down the drain.
@aliyaorali / via Snapchat Runner-Up #3: Rebecca Brunsberg, SEAS ’19
I’m pretty sure that time of the semester started long ago, but I’m glad you’re still keeping up the habit. Besides, the clutter is mostly bags, anyway, so it’s not as messy as it could be…
@reb-123 / via Snapchat Runner-Up #2: Sarah Lu, CC ’20
Bruh. It’s only been two days—how did all of those clothes pile up so quickly? That takes some skill. On the bright side, though, they do weirdly match the aesthetic of your wall decorations. Maybe this is a win for you.
@katnus / via Snapchat Runner-Up #1: Emily Latif, BC ’20
Don’t give up hope, Emily. At least all that sunlight makes your room look kind of pretty. To be honest, I don’t think you (or anyone, really) has a chance of making their rooms spiffy clean until the beginning of next semester.
@emily3954 / via Snapchat Winner: Shelby Hettler, BC ’20
Congratulations, Shelby! The crushed vegetables and the vibe from your frantic expression make you the winner of the messy rooms contest. You win a Muji gift bag extravaganza! Hopefully, it’ll inspire you to be organized and clean from now on.
Side note: why the fruck do you have so many brussels sprouts? We’re concerned.
@shelbyloveskye / via Snapchat
Thank you to everyone who submitted the junk and clutter in their rooms, and congrats to our runner-ups and winner. You’ve been busy with school, which is more important than a clean room, anyway.
Huber Gonzalez is a Columbia College sophomore and Spectrum’s associate editor in charge of user-generated content. He’s glad his room isn’t as messy as those submitted to this contest. Reach him at email@example.com to congratulate him on his cleanliness.